Tea Room Conversation with Judy Giovangelo
The “bully” is all about power and control. Each and every one of us has experienced both sides of this coin. As children, we teased, bullied, or used “power-over” our friends, our pets and, especially, our siblings to gain dominion over our outside world. Sometimes we were the victim of bullying, sometimes we were the bully.
As adults, we bully our children to get them to comply with our ideas of who they should and should not be. In the work place, we bully our coworkers to gain power and our bosses overpower us to maintain control of their position. The bully is alive and well in our society. So how can we slay this dragon?
Bring to mind someone you know who is very happy, healthy, and confident. They are not a bully to anyone; they do not attract bullies into their lives; they exude very high esteem; and, they believe in their greatest potential. They tend to live in and act from their heart, more than from their head, and they are kind not only to themselves, but to those around them. They are often leaders and can stand alone. They are completely at ease with themselves whether surrounded by many people or not. They seem to succeed at whatever they set out to do.
In order to teach this way of being to our children, we must first practice it ourselves and become a model to them. In other words, “be the change” you want to see in the world around you. When we R.E.S.P.E.C.T. and honor ourselves, the world around us will meet us where we are. This is the law of attraction.
R esponsiblity – Take responsibility for your thoughts, words, feelings and actions and recognize that you are the creator of your own experience.
E ffort –Make the effort to be the change you want to see in the world. Rather than focusing on and complaining about a perceived problem, BE the solution.
S elf Love & Acceptance – What you focus on is what you create. Focus on your gifts and accept your weaknesses. Love all of who you are in any given moment. You are perfect, just the way you are.
P atience & Considerate Action – Treat others the way you want to be treated. Like attracts like.
E xpression – Use positive words and language to empower yourself and others. Practice positive affirmations daily.
C ooperation – Be a team player. Be willing to act in service for the greater good of the whole. It takes a village to raise a child.
T hankfulness – Remember, whatever you focus upon is what you create. When you focus on what it is working in your life, you create and attract more of it. Write down five things you are grateful for everyday.
If you use these seven principles of R.E.S.P.E.C.T. to teach your children, they will discover that “power” comes from within; and, when we are empowered from the inside, our outside world will meet us there.
And, with consistent practice, the “bully” can, quite simply, fall away.
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